


Loving ZaNa

by FantasylandwithZee



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-14
Updated: 2019-01-14
Packaged: 2019-10-10 08:55:39
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,824
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17422808
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FantasylandwithZee/pseuds/FantasylandwithZee
Summary: "But our love it was stronger by far than the loveOf those who were older than we-Of many far wiser than we-And neither the angels in Heaven aboveNor the demons down under the seaCan ever dissever my soul from the soulOf the beautiful Annabel Lee"▪▪▪▪▪▪She was my Annabel Lee. My beautiful Zana...





	Loving ZaNa

**Author's Note:**

> contains girl!Zayn

It's cold inside me when I see her. Twirling, turning her body like a ballerina, feet up and then down in a smooth glide.

I have been in a place for long, gathered up too much dust in my flesh but when she brushes past me and her black threads graze against my arm, I am as clear as a newly made diamond.

She stumbles and almost falls but I save her, my arm around her stomach, hand on her back. I have never seen a sunrise so beautiful, as one that I witness when she slowly opens her eyes. I am mesmerized, enchanted by the way she smiles sheepishly, blabbers some weakly strung _sorrys._

Her lips are cherry, shaped like a heart that has never been touched. And her neck is tan, so soft with a wing hiding up behind her ear, lost in those raven strands.

Tomorrow I will see a beautiful girl and she will fall in my arms again. Tomorrow I will ask her name and hold her wrist when she tries to leave. Tomorrow I will make her my princess, find a castle to hide her in.

《♡》

I play the song, press on the black and white keys of the instrument as I drink away my problems. They are dust and they suffocate me, they make me feel hollow, suck away my insides.

The intensity of the music rises as my frustration grows, as I realise I'm on my own inside a mansion that should have been sold, where my ancestors grey flowers and their thorns. Now there's only weed, walls reaching the thundering sky, the rain barking against the glass.

My curls fall to the corner of my mouth, stick to the saliva, rest on my forehead and eyelids when I close my eyes, when the wind blows between cracks.

I'm lonely. Lonely is death. I'm dead.

And then like a dandelion flying in, her pretty little legs glide in, there's a red wolf on the side taking over her tan colour. I'm entranced when she twirls around again, standing on her toes as she lifts the other leg, hands moving with the air.

Her waist is thin, curves backwards when she dances her way to the rhythm of my music. I take her in, devour her in my head, diminish the pace of the song to see her move more slowly, so I can capture her better.

She giggles when she falls again, gazes into my eyes and I swear I've gained the shining green colour in my irises again, the one I had lost long ago.

Comes crawling towards me, her black dress secured around her shape, and her pink lips are blushing, cheeks rosey and her sharp features pull me in like fire pulls a moth in. From so close as she kneels between my legs, she blinks once, twice and again, I am mesmerized by her eyelashes. So black, so thick, so pretty.

When she looks at me and bites her lip, when she looks at me and slides her hand up my thigh, when she looks at me and brushes my curls away, when she looks at me and whispers _dance with me,_ I do not have any option. She cages me in with her slender little fingers, curls her arms around my neck and we step, step, step into the hall. We step, we stride, we dance together but she's better and I look idiotic.

Her entire being moves with purposeful clarity, lets herself swing back, trusting me. She knows I'll hold her in place, won't let her fall, won't let her go.

I see and I'm stunned. I see a new tattoo burning her skin. Right there, on her chest just above her soft breasts, something smokey and brilliant and magical. I see a rose, a rose. I see she's an angel.

《♡》

I realise in the gloom darkness of my room, giant and crowded with posh furniture, ruby velvet curtains that blocked the sun, that I never asked her name. I never held her wrist to stop her. I never gave her my castle.

What must she be thinking of me?

I step into the unheated hallway, trudge down the several real-wood stairs and it's still raining. There's a power cut. My eyes are grey again.

I get lost in the patterns of the braided rugs or the heavy chandeliers above me, or the draining candles flickering with a last hint of an orange flame, or the dirt that has accumulated in corners, or the snow outside that has locked me in.

There's a thick silence blanketing every room of this mansion and I would like to say I cannot handle it, I would like to move away to Paris and stand in the balcony in a small cosy house just in front on the Eiffel tower, see the lights at night and fall into the slow, rhythmic pace of the bright city. But I cannot say it, I cannot get up and move. My life is my curse, my house is my cage. I'm a bird dying in feathers.

I pick the bottle again, let its liquidness take me to LaLaLand where I know I am always welcome, where I know I can see her again.

My rings flash when lightning pours in from outside; I have to spend hours looking at them and figure out why I slid them in, in the first place. It was custom or traditions. Or maybe I just found them on my bedside table when I once woke up. Randomly. Maybe it was her gift to me. I wish so.

However, they were just the last remnants of kinships lost and gone and buried. My favourite one was the rose.

I sit in one of the chairs in the empty parlor, surrounded by more windows and more images of my ancestors, tables and candles burnt out. Time passes slowly when I take another sip from the bottle, time goes by when I stare at my parents enormous picture standing proudly against the rotting cream wall. I haven't been to their room once since they left. I should. I must.

I have been avoiding the moment when I shall have to make my way up the stairs, not to head to my room, but my parents' and shall have to to admit that they're really gone. Forever. And they're not coming back. They have not gone on a royal trip, or to a private picnic, but they have gone to meet the gods and angels in the heavens.

By the time I reach, I am exhausted. So I simply lay down on their plush mattress and stumble my way down the sleep hole.

《♡》

There's a beautiful melody playing somewhere, quiet but clear enough. I wake up but I'm not hungover and it's surprising.

I hear the door swinging open to my parents' chamber where I lay and I look up. She's there, in all her charming glory. She holds my hand, kisses my knuckles and makes all these butterflies come alive in my stomach.

"What's your name?" I ask before I forget.

 _"_ _Zana_ _."_

Zana, you're in my head every second. Zana, you make me feel alive and in good company. Zana, you are beautiful. Zana, I need you, I want you.

Zana, oh my beautiful _Annabel Lee_ , please save me.

She's wearing a greenish-blue gown made of soft, satiny fabric, long and loose. A semicircular, high collar made of silk-like materials headed the ankle-length robe. She walks as lightly as an acrobat. A puff of wind swept through her raven hair before it slipped back into the woods to rustle leaves.

She's the only other colour I have seen in years. In centuries, it seems.

The windows are fogged, I hold her wrist. It's creamy soft and I want a taste of it. The curtains close, I don't have time to think about them. I gaze into her stunning golden eyes, flecks of white swirling in their mist. I cannot look away.

She smiles brightly, her lipstick is maroon today. I count her eyelashes as the silence slips away. The room is darker, the room is enchanted.

_"Do to me what you have been dying to do. Touch me."_

I hold her waist, pull her closer. Who am I to disobey. Let me kiss those pretty little lips of yours, shaped like a heart that has never been touched. Body of a virgin, actions of a tease, kisses so dizzying I forget my name.

And her dress goes down on the floor, hair falling loose from the braid. Her whole body blushes, shrinks adorably as I lay her down and climb on her.

My breath hitches as I admire her beauty, her tattoes done and burning. My skin is chilly; her sun-kissed body is hot, painted with goosebumps as I touch. Gently, slowly, in detail.

When we kiss, it's searing. Her moist warmth rides me into oblivion. Seduction, seduction, seduction. She's pouring it in me. I'm all tangled in her arms and legs, against her chest and stomach, my mouth latched to hers and tips of noses touching. Our eyelashes smile against each other.

Two colours mingling. Me, the icy pale; her, the sunny tan.

I cannot see through the fogged windows, if it's still snowing. I would like to cool her down, to drown in the whiteness with her bare self next to mine.

 _"Harreh..."_ A moan, drawn out, deep and lustful. Needy.

We're two strangers lost in the arms of unquenchable desire, my hands exploring the wetness between her thighs, my tongue rolling around her hardening nipple.

I let her touch herself. I watch her in awe: soft moans and twitching hips, wet fingers fucking. A solo show. Just for me.

Then I'm all in, don't let her work more, do all she wants me to. I let her command my actions, let her guide me to her body. I need to memorize, so I can learn her down to every miniscule detail.

Her back arches off the bed and I slide my hand under, feel the velvet texture of her back in my fingers, keep her arched just like that.

The melody I woke up to, turns louder and louder, buzzes through my system, makes her bones vibrate.

It's the romantic melody mixing with her moans and skin against skin. I realise; love and lust.

《♡》

Everything is quiet. I open my eyes, though they are extremely heavy on me.

It's black. It's blind. It's deaf. I bang on the walls and the ceiling that is suddenly to close to my face, but nobody comes and my voice gives out.  
  


_Oh my_ _beautiful_ _Annabel Lee_

 _What a_ _lovely_ _betrayal_ _,_ _my_ _beautiful_ _love_

_Oh what a lovely betrayal indeed_

_My love, your love and this deceit_

_Will_ _be eternal, it will ring in the_ _heavens_

 _It will resurrect you, it will burn you_  
  


_°•°•°•°•°_

 

_**~End~** _

 


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